Life in Words

I'm a striver. I struggle with being performance oriented. Like a dancing  monkey, I might give you a good performance if you're willing to grant me a worth while reward. This fault has been the thorn in my side when it comes to not only trying to understand the unconditional love of God, but also trying to remember it. How and why would He love me when I haven't given Him a good Christian performance? Isn't He disappointed when I mess up? Isn't He embarrassed by my tantrums and disgraces? This morning as I was talking with Him and almost pleading,      "Abba, I just want to please you. I just want to do Your will..." I felt like He asked,      "Why? Are you serving me out of a fear of punishment or out of love?" Immediately I knew the answer. I had fallen back into fear of punishment. This week hasn't been my most stellar week and I was desperately trying to convince God with my words that I was going to be better. I know be

When I was a little girl, I used to ask my younger sister to pray for things I really hoped would happen because I was convinced that God heard her prayers more than mine. I was in trouble more often than she was so it made logical sense to me that God would ignore my prayers and give ear to her's. When I saw this picture floating around Facebook it made me chuckle and remember the little girl who didn't consider her prayers very important. I imagine there are many others who also would rather have a pastor or someone more official or in tune with God to make their requests to Him on their behalf. How many times do we whisper our prayers and not even consider that God will actually bring to pass what we prayed for? How often do we consider our prayers not as valued as someone else's?  Yet God took notice of David before he was king... of Esther before she as queen... of Mary before she was the mother of Jesus... of Peter before he was a well known apostle

I stand to praise You, But I fall to my knees. My spirit is willing, But my flesh is so weak. Light the fire In my soul, (In my weary soul) Fan the flame, Make me whole. (Make my spirit whole) Lord, You know
 
Just where I've been, (Where I've been) So light the fire in my heart again. I feel Your arms around me, As the power of Your healing begins. You breathe new life right through me, Like a mighty rushing wind. So light the fire in my heart again, Light the fire in my heart again, Light the fire in my heart again (By Bill Maxwell) Awe, the summer church camp memories those lyrics bring to mind. Back then I was more focused on how I sounded then what the song was really saying. Have you ever felt a weary soul? It’s like a slow burning fire, gradually growing cold. If it’s not stoked or reignited, it’ll go out. Sometimes these weary souls are good soldiers—doing everything they ought to be doing. On the outside, by all

I had a bad day yesterday. You know the one—a handful of little aggravating circumstances that haven’t seen results yet topped with a new unforeseen unfortunate circumstance and I broke... big, hard sobs that I had to run and stifle lest I terrify my children. My bed was my place of comfort until I could cry no more. God, where are you? My heart cried. Silence I know the right answers, the right Scriptures, the right attitudes; but at that moment I was broken—my shield and sword no longer defending but laid aside next to my crumbled self. Depression’s ugly face taunted me and tempted me to let him hold my hand. This foe whom I hadn’t seen in a long time was here again waiting for me to decide whose side I was really on. God, why won’t you just miraculously fix this growing lists of challenges I’m facing? Haven’t I tithed faithfully and given offerings? Haven’t I prayed, and fought with Scriptures, and served You? Why am I in this spot?! The vision of Peter

I saw a clip from a story on the news about a kindergarten class that starts each day with the students looking each other in the eyes and greeting each other with a handshake. The eye contact part was not only cute, (one little boy widened his eyes as he looked intently into the eyes of his classmate), but it struck me as vitally important to seeing each other as human beings. Making eye contact with another human being is impactful, creates respect and mutual acknowledgment. How often as a society do we actually make eye contact with each other? With the rise of technology, I find that this eye contact becomes less and less normal. In fact, we often avoid making eye contact at all. Even among those who are supposed to be the closet to us, eye contact is becoming rare. Think about it. How often do you spend time actually making eye contact with your loved ones when you’re in conversation? I would be willing to guess that it’s not often. The majority of us talk while looking at our pho

Do I make a difference? “Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.” (Matthew 5:15) Wouldn’t it be curious if a lamp could ask, “Am I giving you enough light?” Regardless if the lamp thinks it’s making an impact, its light will have some affect... if it’s plugged in and turned on. Whether it has a dim light bulb or a eye blinding LED inside, the lamp will have an effect on the area surrounding it. It is simply not possible for the lamp not to add at least a light to its environment. The same is true for us. I may never know the impact I have had on my environment but I am encouraged by the thought that I have added at least a little light as long as I have been plugged into Him shining His light. May I offer this encouragement for those wondering if you have made a difference? Stay plugged into Him and turned on because you never know what area you may have just lit up for someone else.

“Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless.” ‭‭James‬ ‭ 1:26 ‬ ‭NIV‬‬ http://bible.com/111/jas.1.26.niv We are to be ambassadors of Christ—representatives and reflections. Yet, how can we accurately depict Jesus when our tongues are so quick to burn, cut down and destroy others? James 1:26 says our efforts are worthLESS if we do not know how to control our tongues. One misspoken word... one harsh insult...one passive aggressive expression might be all it takes to uproot a seed that had been previously planted. Tread lightly with those fingers so quick to text back a snarky reply or release a rant on social media. Your words could be the last drop in someone else’s already too broken bucket. “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,” ‭‭James‬ ‭ 1:19 ‬ ‭NIV‬‬ http://bible.com/111/jas.1

For as long as I can remember my mother would recite the armor of God over my sister and me everyday. Now as a mother, I do the same for my children. It is a passage I am very familiar with, but sometimes with familiarity comes a certain mindlessness. You have recited the same words over again for so long that somewhere along the way, they lose their meaning and power. Ephesians 6:11 came up as the verse of the day on my Bible app yesterday and one word in particular caught my attention . . . schemes. "Put on the full armor of God, so that  you can take your stand against the devil's schemes." A scheme is something tricky, underhanded, not fair and blind siding. It is something that can take the wind out of your sails, pull the rug out from underneath you, and leave you disheartened. It is not a full frontal attack. It is not something you see coming. It is not a fair fight.      "You're tired. God won't hold it against you if you don't spend time

"Joseph stored up huge quantities of grain, like the sand of the sea; it was so much that he stopped keeping records because it was beyond measure." (Genesis 41:49) "... it was SO MUCH that he stopped keeping records because it was beyond measure." (emphasis mine) Joseph was a diligent man. It was no accident that Egypt had more than enough grain to survive the 7 years of famine. God had blessed Joseph with many gifts and one of them, in my opinion, must have been the gift of administration. Can you imagine being in charge of an entire country's food reserves? Not only that, but also being the person everyone is looking to, to make sure there is enough food for later! What a huge responsibility! He must have been blessed with the gift of administration. I can not imagine someone without that gift being able to accomplish such an enormous task. Now here's the part of that verse that really stuck out to me... He did his job so well that there came a p

I arrive at the airport of life with much anticipation but also with many questions. I wasn’t expecting so many different counters all offering tickets to a final destination. JESHOOTS Pixabay.com Which counter offers a ticket to my perfect final destination and for how much? I wonder... "Excuse me sir," I politely ask, "which counter offers the ticket to the perfect final destination?" "Oh I don’t like discussing the perfect final destination," he gruffly replies. "You must look at all the counters available and decide for yourself which way to go." "Thank you!" I answer, grateful for the logical sounding advice. Upon arriving at the first counter, I read the informational screen at the beginning of the line: Final destination: unknown Price: whatever you think might be enough. Fine print: the actual amount may vary and nothing is guaranteed until you arrive at the gate. I don’t care much for the fine print, I thi

We are currently reading through the book of Exodus as a family, and a part of chapter 19 jumped out at me. While meeting with Moses, God instructed him to tell the people to prepare themselves because He is going to come down in a "dense cloud" (Exodus 19:9) so that the people can hear Him and see Him meeting with Moses. What would you do if you were told that tomorrow God is going to meet with you at a specific location? Would you be excited? Nervous? Scared? Would you prepare for your meeting? Clear your calendar and silence your phone? Here's the really great part... He does want to meet with you at the location of your choice every single day. Sometimes, I feel like we often wait for something spectacular to happen to meet with God. We hope for a dense cloud to descend or a booming voice from heaven; but the reality is we most often hear from Him when we are quiet, still and listening. In my experience, it is not usually a loud voice or a lighting strike, bu

Obedience is a pretty black and white issue. Did you do what you were told or not? Somehow my kids try to make it as gray as they can. They either don't remember if they completed said task or claim they don't remember my instructions ever being given. There seems to be a explanation offered at every opportunity. The thing is that the issue really is not as complicated as they want to make it. Either they obeyed or they did not. It is during these times as a parent that I realize how much of a kid I must still be in God's eyes. I was given an instruction and... Well, let me explain, God... I couldn't talk to her right then... I wasn't prepared to give him cash... I didn't want them to think that... The excuses continue. Really it's just a simple issue--did I do what He told me to or not? Praise God for His ever tender mercy because I fear I still have much growing up to do.