Skip to main content

Fatherly Love

I wander from God's love at times. With a house to keep clean and a baby's constant care I find myself only praying my routinely AM and PM prayers. No stopping to listen. No being still to acknowledge that He is God. Just get it done. Then I wonder why I feel so empty inside.

This afternoon with Elisa sleeping in her swing I heard a still, small voice again. "Maria, the same way you find yourself longing to know that Elisa smiles for you because you are mama is the same way I long for you to stop and smile with Me because I am Abba Father." Wow! God is Almighty, Infinite, All Powerful, Redeemer, Friend, Discipliner if needed, constant Provider; but above all He is still Abba Father--Daddy. How easily I forget this. How little I realize it. How much more I wish I held on it. He is my Father. He does not wait for me to mess up to "thump" me. He does not mope around for days ignoring me because I've been bad. He does not simply hand out money and answer prayers because He has to. He is not satisfied with my "Hey God, what's up? Keep my loved ones safe and help me make it through today." Just like I look down at Elisa in her crib and wait for her to open her eyes and smile at me because I am mama, God waits for me to open my eyes and say "Good morning, Father."
Why I fear Him more than I love Him sometimes bewilders me.
Yet I am thankful that He continues to use my baby to teach me more and more about Him and His Fatherly, unconditional love every day.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Mother's Prayer Journal

Pages filled with anxious thoughts. Self rebukes over faithless walks. Tear stained ink blots. Happily scribbled exclamation dots. Trials recorded and lives unfolded, Over the creased lines of stories told. Pleas for wisdom. Cries for mercy. Answered petitions, And surprised renditions Of stories with newly twisted plots. Desperation. Exasperation. Written daily! Then forgotten lazily... Stories of successful potties. Frustration with consistent naughty. Prayers of hope. Prayers for peace. Memory verses needed as Persistent sources of daily strength. Determined stances. Defeated chances. Joy filled exclamations. Laughed over situations. Healing supplications. Worship then adoration. These are what fill my pages. Stories of my children's lives. Written with a fiery drive By a mother who strives To cover them in prayer. Memories for one day soon. A notebook to be passed on to you. A family recipe better than any heirloom. A mother'...
Post a Comment
Read more

Big lessons in small packages

Motherhood is hard. I can't tell you the number of nights I worry if I am doing enough, being enough, getting enough parenting answers right. I've always been one to want to get it right the first time. I don't particularly care to attempt something that I think I'll fail. I'm not much of a risk taker. Give me a planner and no uninterrupted plans and I'm a happy person. But kids don't work like that. Let's be really honest--life doesn't work like that. Kids are loud, chaotic, curious, energetic and non-stop. They can't wait to experience everything and I'm nervous about experiencing anything. They soak up all the emotional, mental and physical energy I have during the day and then have the audacity to ask for more energy during the night for whatever reason. There is no day off, no holiday break, no weekends. I am fully responsible to feed, clothe, care for, nurture, teach and protect each one every. single. day. Anyone else feel a li...
Post a Comment
Read more

Living out your mission--even if it's too loud this morning

I love my kids. I want nothing but the best for them and I enjoy their unique personalities. That being said... It's hard to selflessly devote each second of each day of every week all year long to them. There are those days when I don't feel like getting up to be on call mommy all day again. This morning was one of those days... They were being just a little too loud a little too early for me and I could feel the nerves inside cringing already. Then I read this... “I thank him who has given me strength, Christ Jesus our Lord, because he judged me faithful, appointing me to his service,” ‭‭1 Timothy‬ ‭ 1:12 ‬ ‭ESV‬‬ http://bible.com/59/1ti.1.12.esv ...and I felt immediately thankful that God had counted me faithful/hardworking enough to grant me the opportunity to watch over my two for a time. Despite my past failures, He had seen enough of something in me to know that He could entrust two little souls to my care. I am in His service--daily caring for two pe...
Post a Comment
Read more